These Humans – Flash Fiction for 11/2/12

If you would like to come out and play with Rochelle Wisoff-Fields and the Friday Fictioneers, click here and folllow the instructions.

These humans are difficult to understand, intelligent yet contrary. Their customs are peculiar. They wear protection for their eyes against the sun when their sun is not in the sky. They inhale smoke from burning plant matter. They drink light beer. They worship screens of flickering colors.

But this exploratory survey mission is worth it for the meats. The humans have meat and fish in abundance, beef, pork, chicken, mutton, goat, turkey, duck, venison, lobsters, oysters, meats that have not existed on our planet for centuries. And of course the sweetest flesh of all, a freshly roasted Johnny or Jill.

29 responses to “These Humans – Flash Fiction for 11/2/12

  1. Must be the closeness to Halloween– the Fictioneers are out in spooky, other-worldly force. Good twist at the end. Are there vegetarian/vegan aliens or monsters? Just wondering.

  2. Ron, you’re missing an “i” in the link on the database so it isn’t working.

    Haha, I think we were on the same brainwave with this one. Your narrator is just a different life form, that’s all.

  3. Either Halloween or the full moon cast a spooky spell over the Fictioneers this week! But my favorite part was your description of the human race — intelligent, but contrary. So true!

    P.S. – You have a typo on your link on Rochelle’s inlinkz.

  4. I’m not so sure I want to go to another fair after reading some of these! But they do look like they’re lined up for some kind of a meat market. I really like the first paragraph. It makes me feel sorry for any alien trying to figure us out.

  5. You forgot to mention “old goat” on the menu, but I assume you left that one out on purpose πŸ™‚

    This reminds me of a short film from years ago where the aliens refered to cigarettes as breathing sticks.

  6. OMG Scary. I like “Humans are difficult to understand” aren’t we though. There’s s lot going on there that totally works great. I’d love to know more about this survey, and the Planet the surveyor is from. Thanks for dropping a comment on mine.

  7. well done. but for the observer to know the names “johnny” and “jill” seems to personal, more than they would be aware of. how about “man or woman” or “boy or girl” or “male or female.”?

  8. Ok, I had to follow an odd path to get this link to work, but it was worth it. Ewww, and ewww! Shades of Twilight Zone and the “How to Cook Man,” episode, but worse, they were masked as one, yes?

  9. Found you! Wow, you totally brought back memories of that Twilight Zone episode Swirling Turnip mentioned. What’s on the menu? Roasted leg of man. LOL A twisted and dark tale, indeed. Nicely done.

  10. Hi Ron…Ah…so that’s how we appear to “them.” Did you list Pig’s feet? Glad my name is not Jill.

    ps: I had trouble accessing your link as well… then noticed your word “burning” had an extra “i” typed in… so corrected it and voila… it worked.

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